Asking for Help with Intimacy
The date with Esther had been easy in all the right ways. Sunlight on the café terrace. Coffee within rolling distance of home. Conversation that didn’t orbit his wheelchair or his diagnosis. She’d been calm, grounded—someone who already knew muscular disease, who didn’t need explanations or careful pauses.
And because of that, the insecurity arrived later.
Back home, in the quiet that follows a good first date, Bumbly felt the question surface—the one he’d been skilled at keeping submerged.
He wasn’t sure anymore if he could satisfy her sexually.
Not because he didn’t want her. Not because the chemistry wasn’t there. But because his body had changed in ways he could no longer ignore. He could no longer reliably please himself the way he once had. What used to be familiar had become inconsistent, sometimes painful, sometimes impossible.
And if he couldn’t reach pleasure on his own terms—how could he be sure he could give it to someone else?
The thought didn’t come with panic. It came with a steady, uncomfortable honesty. He didn’t want to disappoint Esther. He didn’t want to improvise confidence where uncertainty lived. Most of all, he didn’t want to enter intimacy pretending this wasn’t part of his reality.
Bumbly had learned many things about problem-solving over the years. He’d learned that independence didn’t mean doing everything alone. At Spoonie Pawprints HQ, challenges were met with tools, preparation, and care—never with denial. Heat pads weren’t weakness. Planning wasn’t romance-killing. Asking for help was how things got done.
So he applied the same logic here.
Bumbly made a quiet, deliberate decision. He sought professional help—not to be fixed, not to chase performance, but to understand his body as it was now. To learn what was possible, what needed support, and how intimacy could be shaped around reality instead of shame.
Her name was Janine.
When she arrived, nothing felt rushed or clinical. They talked first—about his fears as much as his desires. About muscle fatigue, pressure points, limits, and aftercare. About the fear of not being enough for someone he genuinely liked.
Janine listened the way professionals do when they respect both the body and the person inside it. She asked practical questions. Clear questions. Questions that treated intimacy as something learnable, adaptable, and worthy of care.
That was the point.
Bumbly wasn’t trying to become someone else for Esther. He was trying to show up honestly—with preparation instead of bravado, with dignity instead of silence.
Sometimes courage didn’t look like confidence.
Sometimes it looked like admitting uncertainty—and choosing to meet it head-on.